Bucky O' Hare
In
The Adventures of Captain Aniverse
By Andrew Norris

SCENE ONE
DuWitt Residence, San Francisco, Earth
WILLY is sat on his bed, looking at the Titans communicator given to 
him by Bumblebee sometime ago.

WILLY: (To himself) Gee, this is the first time I've ever felt wanted 
since...

He looks over at the Aldebaran memory stone on his desk.

WILLY: ...maybe the guys have forgotten about me. It's been ages since 
they called.

He goes over to the memory stone and leaves the communicator on his bed.

WILLY: (Into the stone) Jenny, are you there?

JENNY: (In Willys' mind) < Willy, you picked a bad time to call! I need 
to pilot the ship away from this asteroid storm! >

WILLY: Jenny, I wanna help! Let me activate my accelerator and...

JENNY: < Willy, we need all the power we have, and we can't have you 
getting hurt! >

WILLY: But...

JENNY: (Snaps) < No! You will stay where you are! We can't let you get 
hurt, Willy, now stay there! >

She fades away, and WILLY looks hurt. He looks back to the communicator.

WILLY: (Sullen) That's the first time she's ever told me off...but I'll 
show her that I'm not a kid!

SCENE TWO
Fireball XL6, Genus Control Centre, Genus
AMD-4 and HANNAH are giving the XL6 a spring-cleaning, while BUTCH uses 
a vacuum-cleaner to clean the floor. He suddenly noses it into 
something.

BUTCH: Hello, what's this?

Switching the vacuum off, he picks up a large helmet with the union 
jack embossed on it, that had been wedged behind a computer screen. 

AMD-4: (Looking at helmet) Scanning now: subject is strong covering 
designed to protect the cranial area of the body.

HANNAH: A helmet, you mean?

BUTCH: Maybe Andy knows what it is.

OUTSIDE, ON THE WINGS...
SUB-LIEUTENANT ANDREW NORRIS is on a wooden ladder repairing some loose 
wiring.

HANNAH: (Walks out) Andrew!

ANDREW: Yes?

HANNAH: Can you explain to us what this helmet is?

BUTCH shows him the helmet, and ANDREW climbs down to inspect it.

ANDREW: (Laughs) Thanks, Butch! I've been looking for this everywhere!

AMD-4: Android requests knowledge of subjects' origin.

ANDREW: Well, when I was younger, I was in The British Teen Titans, 
right?

They nod.

ANDREW: Well, as the original Teen Titans were to the Justice League, 
we were affiliated with the Captain Britain Corps.

He points to a label embossed on the back of the helmet, reading: 
CAPTAIN ENGLAND - CAPTAIN BRITAIN CORPS.

ANDREW: When we joined up, we made a pact with the Captain Britain 
Corps to help each other out, and Captain England gave this to us as a 
peace offering, in exchange for one of our communicators.

HANNAH: But when you left the British Teen Titans, who took control 
afterwards?

ANDREW: The Quixotic assumed control, and a member of the Corps, 
Captain UK Junior, joined up. That's the last I heard of them.

There is an explosion from nearby, and the four rush in time to see a 
female TIGER dressed in a skintight black suit, holding CORPORAL NASS 
at gunpoint.

TIGER: All right, which one of you is the head-man around here?

BUTCH: (Threatening) Why? What do you want with Richard?

TIGER: I'll only speak to an .S.P.A.C.E. officer, not some walking rug!

ANDREW: (Steps forward) I'm Sub-Lieutenant Norris, I'm a junior officer, 
now what is your business?

TIGER: An Ensign, eh? The .S.P.A.C.E. must be getting desperate! Now 
listen closely, baboon. I'm the Empress of Death, and I hereby claim 
the .S.P.A.C.E. to be under the control of the Empire of Evil. YOU will 
announce it to the Admiralty, or your precious NCO will feel the wrath 
of my sword!

NASS: (Nervously) Don't do it! Don't worry about me, warn the Admiralty 
about this woman!

THE EMPRESS knocks him over the head and produces a sword from inside 
her sleeve, gently poising under NASS' neck.

EMPRESS: What's it going to be, Ensign? Your job or your friend?

ANDREW: (Sighs) You win; I'll go and tell them.

EMPRESS: A wise choice, my friend.

He goes into the XL6, but then re-appears in his Chuck Bodgers, and 
kicks the sword out of her hand. CORPORAL NASS runs off to alert the 
Home Guard, and THE EMPRESS gets up, yielding another sword from the 
other sleeve.

EMPRESS: (Snarls) But that was a foolish decision!

Before she can strike, a blonde-haired HUMAN about WILLYS' height 
knocks her to the floor. The HUMAN is dressed in a deep blue suit with 
several planets decorated about it, and has a helmet similar to Captain 
Englands', which is also deep blue and has the initials "CA" on them.

EMPRESS: Another friend of yours? You cannot be serious!

HUMAN: You're right, we'd best keep things on the straight and narrow!

Upon saying the word "straight", a javelin appears from seemingly 
nowhere and he throws it at the EMPRESS, narrowly missing her head. 
Grabbing her sword, he cuts off her utility belt and throws it into an 
open manhole cover. 

EMPRESS: You wretched little prat!

She reaches out to strangle him, but he suddenly knocks her unconcious 
with a tazer and disappears before the Home Guard arrive. ANDREW, BUTCH 
and HANNAH can only stare.

AMD-4: Android requests information on stranger.

SCENE THREE
UAC Officers' Lounge
BUCKY and JENNY are both sitting on a sofa drinking coffee and relaxing 
from their mission.

JENNY: (Worried) You don't think I was too harsh on Willy do you?

BUCKY: Jenny, Willy has to learn someday that he's still a kid.

JENNY: I know, but I just feel that I was a bit too sharp to him.

BUCKY: If you want to apologize, then I'm not stopping you.

The TV suddenly interrupts before they can continue.

NEWSREADER: This just in: the UAC has just arrested a psychotic maniac 
who goes by the name of the Empress of Death...

BUCKY and JENNY listen carefully.

NEWSREADER: (Continued) Eyewitnesses claim that this lunatic was 
defeated by an unknown stranger who looked similar to this artists' 
impression.

A sketch of THE HUMAN appears, just as WILLY walks in, who just laughs.

WILLY: (Chuckles) Gee, they sure got me on the news fast enough!

BUCKY: (Stands up and drops his coffee) What?!?!

WILLY just crosses his arms.

WILLY: It's time I grew up, Bucky, you know that.

BUCKY: I do, but like this?

WILLY: What's wrong with Captain Aniverse?

JENNY: (Raises an eyebrow) Who?

WILLY: Captain Aniverse; my alter-ego. If I can't grow up in battle, 
then I'll go my way.

He storms out and crashes into ANDREW, who gets up and walks into the 
Lounge.

BUCKY: (Hisses) What the hell have you been putting inside his head?

ANDREW: Excuse me?

BUCKY: That guy who helped you out at Genus Control; that was Willy! 
He's trying to make himself a superhero just because Jenny yelled at 
him!

ANDREW: (Pause) The idiot! I don't say that because he was over-
sensitive, but he won't get far with a few gadgets.

JENNY: Why not?

ANDREW: You forget, Jenny, that I've lived through a life like that; 
even though you don't need powers to be a superhero, you do need muscle 
power, and in Willys' case, it's more brain power.

BUCKY: Are you saying he's weak?

ANDREW: (Nods) I don't mean it to be offensive, but unless he tries to 
tone up, he won't last a week.

SCENE FOUR
Genus Memorial Gardens
WILLY, dressed as Captain Aniverse, is fighting a band of thugs who are 
trying to cut up pieces of Titanic II for scrap-metal. After defeating 
them with tazers, WILLY is seen fighting various street gangs, bank 
robbers and madmen with his javelin. As this happens, a cheesy pop song 
is heard.

CHORUS: (Singing) Captain Aniverse,
                  Champion of deep, deep space,
                  Captain Aniverse,
                  Stopping bad guys at a steady pace,

                  Better watch out in the dead of night,
                  When you're just out on your own,
                  Cos you may end up in a fight,
                  Then you'll wish you weren't alone,
 
                  Captain Aniverse,
                  Champion of deep, deep space,
                  Captain Aniverse,
                  Smackin' a punch right in your face,

                  Got a sleek old stick he likes to throw,
                  And a box for a short sharp shock,
                  Where there's trouble, he will go,
                  And with his fist, he'll sock sock sock,

                  Captain Aniverse,
                  Champion of deep, deep space,
                  Captain Aniverse,
                  Servin' justice with steady grace...


SCENE FIVE
UAC Officers' Lounge, Genus
ANDREW is asleep on the sofa with an empty drinks bottle on the table. 
BUCKY enters and notices this. Picking up the bottle, he throws it into 
the bin so the glass smashes, waking ANDREW up.

ANDREW: (Jumps) Argh! (Calms down) Oh, Bucky. What is it?

BUCKY: (Sits down) You know why I'm here; Captain Aniverse is making a 
big name for himself.

ANDREW: So did Aquaman, but what can I do about it?

BUCKY: You're the ex-hero, you figure it out!

ANDREW moves over to a small bookcase and pulls out a dictionary.

ANDREW: Maybe this might explain my situation easier to you. (Reads 
dictionary) "Retire: verb, give up ones' regular work because of age."

BUCKY is about to say something, but ANDREW interrupts again.

ANDREW: I know that I'm an ex-hero, but you have to respect that I 
can't bail you out all the time. That would be like Fritz asking you to 
stay on patrol 24 hours daily.

BUCKY: (Sighs) I know, but who else can influence him? He still doesn't 
trust me or Jenny after telling him off.

ANDREW: True, but there is someone else.

SCENE SIX
Titanic II, Genus Memorial Gardens, Genus
WILLY, dressed as Captain Aniverse, is inspecting the ship.

WILLY: (Mumbles) Hmm, no sign of distress. So why was I called out here?

EMPRESS: I can tell you why, Captain!

Spinning around, WILLY is confronted by THE EMPRESS OF DEATH, who 
instantly fires two glowing strands at WILLYS' hands, restraining him 
to the deck of Titanic II.

EMPRESS: (Spitefully) When my Empire was declared, Captain, I did not 
seize power through peaceful terms with scum like you!

WILLY: What do you mean "scum like me"?

EMPRESS: You know what I mean! Peacemongers! Do-gooders! And in my book, 
you're just a troublemaker, but you'll soon know your place! Lieutenant!

From the shadows steps another female TIGER dressed in a black suit 
similar to THE EMPRESS, but is more utilitarian and has the army 
insignia of a lieutenant made from pewter skulls.

TIGER: (Gruff voice) Lieutenant Fear reporting for duty, your 
Imperialness!

EMPRESS: (Slyly) Captain Aniverse, meet Lieutenant Fear. She may rank 
lower than you, but at least she uses her powers for a better cause!

WILLY: (Nervous) P...Powers?

EMPRESS: Give the Captain a demonstration, Lieutenant.

LIEUTENANT: Yes, your grace!

She looks at the lookout tower on Titanic II, and by simply hitting it 
with the side of her hand, the colossal iron cylinder crashes to the 
floor, spraying debris everywhere. 

EMPRESS: Well, Captain? Will you allow me to colonize this miserable 
planet, or will I have to ask Lieutenant Fear to demonstrate her 
abilities on a human being?

GIRL: (From behind) How about neither?

THE EMPRESS and LIEUTENANT FEAR both spin around, and are confronted by 
BUMBLEBEE, leader of the Teen Titans East. Having arrived alone in an 
unusual pumpkin-coloured spaceship, she stares icily at THE EMPRESS.

BUMBLEBEE: Ain't nobody gonna beat up a Teen Titan on my watch, sister!

LIEUTENANT: (Threateningly) Bring it on, little girl! 

LIEUTENANT FEAR tries to hit BUMBLEBEE, but she simply begins to fly 
about with the aid of her wings, and stings both LIEUTENANT FEAR and 
THE EMPRESS violently.

LIEUTENANT: (Snarls) You wretched little...

BUMBLEBEE kicks LIEUTENANT FEAR in the face while she is busy 
monologuing. LIEUTENANT FEAR staggers about for a moment and then hits 
her head on the wreckage of the lookout tower, knocking her out.

EMPRESS: Now, it is my turn!

As BUMBLEBEE and THE EMPRESS fight, WILLY flicks open a small metal rod 
from the fingertip of his glove. This drains the power of the 
restraints and releases him, only in time to see BUMBLEBEE knocked 
unconcious by THE EMPRESS.

EMPRESS: (Looking up at Willy) Ah, you're just in time for the finale! 
So long, you pitiful wasp!

Before she can stab BUMBLEBEE with the aid of a cutlass, the reasonably 
weak WILLY uses his last ounce of strength to shove THE EMPRESS  from 
the decks of the old ship and down to the ground below...

SCENE SEVEN
Watership Hospital, a few hours later
BUMBLEBEE is at WILLYS' side, with his right arm swathed in bandages. 
THE EMPRESS sits in a secluded ward down the hall with UAC personnel 
all around her.

BUMBLEBEE: (To Willy) Glad those things are only temporary, huh?

WILLY looks down at the bandages.

WILLY: (Dully) Yeah, I guess it saves me the bother of telling my 
parents about what happened.

BUMBLEBEE: You know, Willy, I guess it proves why its' important to get 
into shape before pulling off a crazy stunt like what you did.

WILLY: I know...but I was just upset about what Jenny said.

BUMBLEBEE: Well, Jenny tells me she's willing to take it all back if 
you're prepared to give up this charade.

WILLY: But what about the Titans?

BUMBLEBEE: (Softly) As far as I'm concerned, your work here covers for 
anything the Titans have ever done.

WILLY: (Smiles) Thanks.

BUMBLEBEE returns the smile and turns to leave.

WILLY: (Calls out) Just one thing, how did you know where to find me?

BUMBLEBEE: Well, lets' just say you have some good friends, Willy.

She leaves WILLY to think about what has been said. Outside the ward, 
ANDREW is waiting.

ANDREW: (To Bumblebee) How is he?

BUMBLEBEE: (Quietly so Willy can't hear) Just a graze on his arm, but 
he'll be fine.

ANDREW: Thanks, Miss Bumblebee. He's only snap out of it if the message 
was put across by a younger person.

BUMBLEBEE: And I still have a question for you: How did you know about 
the Teen Titans?

ANDREW: (After a pause) I think it best if you found out for yourself 
in the future.

BUMBLEBEE, rather confused, goes to leave.

THE END